Saturday, 1 December 2007

Hostel part 1

[This post is for consenting adults only! I bear no responsibility for those echor e paka, less than 18 year olds who read this! a guardian must accompany them while reading this post, and decide whether or not to let their sons to an engineering college hostel! For girls who have lived in the pinky pinky paradise of their mother's lap the following post might seem to be rude, for the guys and other type of girls this was my life in hostel and I am being absolutely honest about it...There will be more posts coming on it as time passes by]

No dude, this ain’t gonna be the review of the Quentin Tarantino flick. Those are not as amusing as real life can be. Trust me my hostel life was ruder, violent and a step in the guy’s world with a hilarious touch on it. A whole new world where you get to know guys from Bengal’s remotest places to the posh and sexy ones telling us stories of hooking with a high class escort! Life was never as educating as this.

I went to a residential engineering college in West Bengal. Life one fine day became different for me. There you go alone in a completely different world devoid of any parental insurance, empty of motherly care. It was a man’s world.

First day when I faced ragging I just came to the college to get admitted. My father was with me. He was a man of middleclass values and morality. Already pouring his anxiety in my ears as words of wisdom and advice, he was visibly worried to let his son be alone. There were those much feared tribe of people around, the so called seniors looking like street goons with their unshaved faces. I got called from a second year hostel. My father waited outside. I, worried and nervous, went ahead towards the hostel while my father waited on the street. It was a classic scene. I was growing up.

My first ragging with my father standing nearby was not much exciting. It was a bunch of kind seniors who were good natured and asked me couple of half wit questions before asking me to go join my father.

As time passed by I grew into the hostel. Or rather hostel grew inside me like a parasite. Or better to say probably a mutual symbiotic relationship was created between me and hostel. All the hostilities from the seniors were nothing before this growing bond. This was a bond which taught me life.

I still remember the first few days, every day after college some or other seniors used to call me. I was probably one of the most unlucky guys around. I was a quiet calm fellow always living in the shadows. But somehow my hunters would find me out. I was pretty naïve at that time. Having come from Siliguri I didn’t know many things. Yes, I hadn’t seen a full porn movie yet. It was banned on siliguri cable not even on the late night. I hadn’t known the local slang for masturbation! I didn’t know the exact terminologies of a female anatomy. I didn’t know cursing to the fullest extent.

So the ragging sessions became learning sessions for me. I learnt all these things plus a few more. I learnt how to read a news paper when after every word you insert “My C***k” and then after another word you insert “your c**t”. I learnt what will be the trajectory if a drop of water falling from tip of Madhuri’s nose to the very end and places it would travel. I learnt how to calculate PCM of myself. I learnt also how to propose to a senior girl!

Our college in that manner was civilised when we joined. None actually got me naked and spanked me on my butt. None actually ordered me to have a zebra fashioned moustache (probably because my moustache was quite thin and unnoticeable that time). None actually made me play “lalu bhulu” with a fellow guy. And I am thankful to my seniors for these. As, if I were asked to do these things, God knows what I would have done, but for one thing was sure the guys who were coming to join this hostel as our successors, things could only get worse.

8 comments:

ad libber said...

Yes, yes!!! Finally I get to know what really happens in hostels. Go on, Go on, write more, write everything!!

matty said...

good post...i could identify with d ragging part...
d engg colleges r d same all over india...

Setu said...

heh.. nice post.. same story everywhere i guess.. funny reading it..

btw, thanks for ur comments..

The Ancient Mariner said...

@Ad liber,
Yes I will..stay tuned! :-)

@Matty,

Couldn't agree more

@Setu,
Thanks to you too!

The Tentacles of Thought said...

Mayb u shud read my exhaustiv post on raggin....ul get a wholesome idea.....mind u..its done after lots of research....ul enjoy it.....
http://www.deathlycatacombs.blogspot.com/

and yea....raggin is one of the main reasns i dint go to kolkata even aftr gettn in heritage institute.......so im in mumbai nw...

The Tentacles of Thought said...

Ancient mariner....hmm....iron maidn?

The Ancient Mariner said...

@tentacles,

I did read through your post about ragging. it is a nice collection.

But having completed my four years of getting ragged the first year and next three ragging the newer batches, I can say for most part I enjoyed it. Ragging in bengal also gets ugly only when the retaliation occurs in a bad form. You must remember that the people who are ragging are not criminals. They will not do something which will be a violation of human rights and all. Although can't deny that it does get ugly sometimes without provocation too. But it makes you tougher and enable you to face all the realities of life strongly. It helps you to grow up to become a man. So ragging is something to be enjoyed, it will come only once in your life. Don't hide from it.

by the way, Iron maiden???

azeem said...

hillarious [:D]